A little sleep-deprived, I’m writing this on a plane as I travel internationally again. This time I’m headed to my youngest sister’s bachelorette party in Los Cabos, Mexico, and I’m so excited to share this blast of a milestone with her a month before her wedding. It’s a wedding that’s been more than two years in the planning and years and years in the making.
This summer has moved so quickly and the energy has felt so pranic that I wonder whether Vayu, the god of wind, is in the director’s chair. There’s has been so much upward-moving energy that over the past few weeks, I try to fairly frequently spend a few minutes taking longer exhales than inhales, to make sure I am as grounded as I need to be.
Consider the milestones of last week:
- I finished my 200th hour of assisting in the Ashtanga Yoga: Ann Arbor Mysore room, which means I finished my 300-hour apprenticeship with Angela Jamison. So. Incredible. More on that in a bit.
- A Pure Michigan tourism ad that my husband and I are in launched, causing a flurry of activity, with people around the country messaging us about how they saw us on the Food Network. More on that in a bit too.
- My husband and I finally finished our side business’s new website. Whew! It’s not that it took us that much time to finish, but given everything else going on, it did feel like a sprint.
And the past couple of months generally?
- Creatively, this spring, My husband and I made a little weekend retreat for ourselves to recommit to nurturing our creative writing energies. I am so grateful for this blog, but it’s a very specific kind of writing, and I’d like to broaden the scope of what I write about. This week, a piece I submitted to Rebelle Society was published (not quite a departure from what I’ve been writing, but it was fun), and last month, a local publication ran a story I wrote about World Cup soccer. So I’m trying…
- I’m also trying in other ways. My husband I are back trying to get pregnant.
Pregnancy, or lack thereof
I wrote about last summer in the post “My long and apanic summer being pregnant – and miscarrying.” July 2013 was especially trying. That month, I spent about three weeks deep in the miscarriage process. I learned in the worst possible way from an ultrasound tech that rather than being 12 weeks pregnant, I had probably miscarried around seven weeks (bedside manners matter, and this person had none). I spent more than a week trying to miscarry naturally to avoid a D & C. I spent another four days or so in a fair amount of pain using misoprostol to try to get the job done (this is a ulcer drug used off-label for women trying to complete a miscarriage). Finally, I gave in and went to the hospital for the D & C. For weeks, I couldn’t even say the word “miscarriage” without taking a deep breath and tearing up; I ended up having to write about it to hasten my emotional healing process. I’ve written a lore more about it since – especially the role the miscarriage played in getting me to India.
The Mysore room
I’m not ready do The Blog Post yet about completing the 300-hour apprenticeship with Angela – too much to reflect on. The one-two spiritual punch of the meditation retreat in May with this milestone – both coming after the trip to India – is a lot to digest, and I don’t want to rush it.
(Truth be told, I wrote a draft while in India about what I had learned from the apprenticeship by that point, but it wasn’t the right time to flesh it out. So I set it aside. I’ll take another peek at that later this summer or in the fall and see how I feel about it.)
The short answer of what this means, though, is that outwardly, nothing really changes. ☺ I’ll still be assisting and I’ll still be learning. And importantly, I’ll remain so tremendously grateful for my teacher and for the students in the room who become the teachers through their presence and support of the apprentices.
How an introvert geeks out over being in a commercial
There’s a specific reason that I included in the milestone list the fact that Scott and I were cast in a national television commercial: It speaks to the process of becoming comfortable in my own skin. And how that happened has everything to do with yoga, meditation — and probably writing too.
Don’t get me wrong – it has been a total hoot to be in this commercial. We had such a fun time starring in this Pure Michigan ad in which we get to talk about how much we love visiting Traverse City, set on Lake Michigan’s Grand Traverse Bay.
But it’s also been fascinating to consider it from a more spiritual point of view. I’ve created a good many narratives about who I am – not a morning person (until I became one), not an extrovert (well, OK, still not an extrovert!), etc. I am realizing that when capable of being more in tune with the flow – however one conceptualizes that – boundaries become a lot more permeable. If my husband and I had been asked even a year ago if we wanted to be considered for a national television commercial – even if it was for something we loved – we wouldn’t have been comfortable enough to say yes – it wouldn’t be the kind of thing that we did. When this opportunity came up in May, we thought, “Sure, why not? Let’s see where this takes us.”
So . . . all this pranic energy. I’m going with the flow and interested in where it takes me. For now, it’ll need to get me through a bachelorette party (my first!) in Mexico in one piece. Good thing I’ve got my travel mat and Mysore rug (which doubles as a meditation cushion) in my suitcase to keep me grounded.
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